‘You make it sound so – simple,’ I told him impulsively. ‘But it isn’t, it really isn’t. The feelings are so mixed-up, so confused! One moment I’d do anything to hurt him as he’s hurt me – but when I see how deeply he’s suffering, I’d give years of my life to comfort him. I forgive him – and at once! – but then I can’t forgive him. I accept that he’s left me for my own good, and I’m convinced he’s a selfish bastard, who’s used me until he’s grown tired of me… Just being here without him makes me feel frantic, and yet – ’
‘You mean, I think,’ he said slowly, looking at me, really looking into me, for the first time, ‘that you feel also, inexplicably, drawn to me.’
And I did mean that, exactly that.





